If you've ever watched "The Nanny," you might remember the episode when Fran gets married and Mr. Scheffield's sister talks to her before the ceremony. "I'd like to give you a warm welcome into the family," says she. Then, barely touching Fran's shoulder with the tip of her fingers and with the fakest smile on her face she says "Welcome." And Walks away. The feelings of "warmth" from a greeting like this often fill me when I am around people from Church. And no wonder. A couple recent episodes in my life just showed me once again how close-minded some Christians can be.
A man introduced himself after the service yesterday. He asked whom I was texting the entire time. I gladly let him know that it was my friend, and that the friend will be joining me now for the 7:15 service. It's the same friend that I wrote about before -- the one who pronounced themselves to be an atheist. So in a few words I shared the story and my excitement. The words that came out of the guys' mouth next just made me wonder. "Wow, that is really encouraging to hear. I guess like Pastor Mark was saying, if anyone pronounced that to me, I would've just thrown them away and considered them a waste of time. But God doesn't. And it's really impressive that you still befriended that person and cultivated a relationship with them and didn't give up."
Rewind to about three weeks ago to a conversation between people from different churches in a cafe. One of the girls emotionally argued that Mars Hill is an bad place because none-Christians feel comfortable coming there. And why the heck would we want so many of them to come?
The friend, who happens to be Hispanic, pointed out to me after church that there was only one person "darker than them" at church. I've never realized that before, but it says something about a church, and quite frankly, it's very disappointing to me. I'm at a place in my life right now where I am close friends with people of all kinds of different origin. If before racism and intolerance, especially in Russian churches, only bothered me as a concept, now it's personal. My closest friends now are from all over the world. Israel, Mexico, Colombia, Guatemala, Philippines, and of course U.S. and Russia. A lot of them are the ones whose prayers get me through each weeks. But a lot of them aren't Christians (yet.) And I'd love it if every single one of them found Jesus Christ as their personal Savior! After myriads of heart-to-hearts and long-time conversations though, if I bring them to church and the welcome that they feel en masse is the one I described in the first paragraph... Well that just undoes all the love of Jesus Christ that any singular kind soul might have ever shown them.
Anyways. I wouldn't say that I'm too surprised at this attitude. But I guess I'm a little surprised that I found it in Mars Hill. I wonder if the man who I talked to would be inspired to befriend an unbeliever now. And then throw them away after they don't immediately repent when he brings them to church. I wish churches were more tolerant. Not towards sin. But towards sinners, viewing them as God views them -- as His children. The ones whom it will grieve Him deeply to judge at the end because He is first and foremost their Father! And only after that the Judge. Think about this.
Monday, December 21, 2009
Tuesday, December 1, 2009
Distractions
If you have been reading this blog for a little while, you know that I've been intently praying about the calling on my heart (music), and that God has been coming through in amazing ways (such as getting me a free keyboard). One of the more specific requests that I voiced to God was a clear guidance about the next step I need to take in order for this ministry to start benefiting others. Of course, He has been faithful, and the answer I got was to legibly write down what up to this point I only have on loose pieces of paper and hummed into a recorder (yes, I DID need an answer from God for something this obvious...) This is a task that I am fully equipped for -- both in education and technology. What apparently I'm lacking is dedication and discipline to just sit down and write! Or that's what I thought.
As soon as I decided that this needs to happen, the enemy started to scheme. And it took me a little while to figure out that all the wonderful things happening in my life in reality aren't wonderful at all!!! All of a sudden I started to get very appealing proposals for things to keep me busy. And by "appealing" I mean deals like translating a very interesting book. I (clearly) have a passion for all things that have to do with writing, editing, and translating. Working with an author who has wit, in a addition to a strong point that I agree with, would have been a dream come true. But the Holy Spirit whispered that I need to stay away and focus on music instead.
This is just one example of the kinds of things that have been happening in my life. The reason I finally recognized that they are distractions rather than opportunities was yet another sermon from pastor Mark Driscoll. He talked about how there's a million of good things we could be doing. But they are not the BEST for us to do. And we need to learn to focus on the ministry or calling that God has placed us into, instead of trying to do everything, be everywhere, and talk to everyone
The result of all the distractions in my life (some of which I admit that I easily gave into) is that, since two months ago that God has told me exactly what to do, I have written down a total of three songs. Laughable. Although I am always tempted to excuse myself and say that three is better than none. But the thing is that I also heard God tell me that we are given a limited amount of time for a reason. That message was very random at the time, but now I see how it applies. I'm living on my own now. And I'm the manager of my time -- probably not forever and maybe even not for long. I need to use the time I have to get to know God more and fulfill the purpose that He has for my life and for my ministry.
If you would like to pray for me, please ask for discernment to distinguish between distractions and opportunities, for strength to tactfully combat distractions, and for discipline to actually sit down and write. I'm thankful for the time and tools God has given me to focus on writing down the songs He keeps placing in my heart. I don't want to squander those blessings.
As soon as I decided that this needs to happen, the enemy started to scheme. And it took me a little while to figure out that all the wonderful things happening in my life in reality aren't wonderful at all!!! All of a sudden I started to get very appealing proposals for things to keep me busy. And by "appealing" I mean deals like translating a very interesting book. I (clearly) have a passion for all things that have to do with writing, editing, and translating. Working with an author who has wit, in a addition to a strong point that I agree with, would have been a dream come true. But the Holy Spirit whispered that I need to stay away and focus on music instead.
This is just one example of the kinds of things that have been happening in my life. The reason I finally recognized that they are distractions rather than opportunities was yet another sermon from pastor Mark Driscoll. He talked about how there's a million of good things we could be doing. But they are not the BEST for us to do. And we need to learn to focus on the ministry or calling that God has placed us into, instead of trying to do everything, be everywhere, and talk to everyone
The result of all the distractions in my life (some of which I admit that I easily gave into) is that, since two months ago that God has told me exactly what to do, I have written down a total of three songs. Laughable. Although I am always tempted to excuse myself and say that three is better than none. But the thing is that I also heard God tell me that we are given a limited amount of time for a reason. That message was very random at the time, but now I see how it applies. I'm living on my own now. And I'm the manager of my time -- probably not forever and maybe even not for long. I need to use the time I have to get to know God more and fulfill the purpose that He has for my life and for my ministry.
If you would like to pray for me, please ask for discernment to distinguish between distractions and opportunities, for strength to tactfully combat distractions, and for discipline to actually sit down and write. I'm thankful for the time and tools God has given me to focus on writing down the songs He keeps placing in my heart. I don't want to squander those blessings.
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